It is sometimes really strange and hard to be a foreigner in a community that I am growing to love so much and to feel so much for. Especially when the oil company’s big American boss and his lawyer are in town. Yesterday morning I went to a meeting that was hosted by the Forestry Department to discuss an application to do an EIA for the seismic testing. All of the usual suspects where there- the local oil company reps, their paid community supporters, folks from the various government departments who are so stoked at the prospect of developing oil, and various protected area managers and NGO folks. Mostly men, lots of indigenous Maya, only a few white folks. I was there representing the NGO I am working for along with a colleague, to take notes and ask questions. And of course because we have taken the Government to the Supreme Court for a judicial review to look into whether or not it is in fact legal to explore for oil in a National Park – there has been an injunction for a couple months now and the oil company has had to stop operations.

Anyway, I don’t know if there was just too much oil driven testosterone in the room, or the heat, or my hangover from the great dinner party the night before- but I was literally feeling ill when the director of the oil company spoke with such charisma about how developing oil can work well with tourism and environmental sustainability, how Colorado and Belize are pretty much the same and Colorado has been able to continue making millions in tourism dollars each year, while having 27,000 active oil wells- oh and they have indigenous peoples too. Well, everyone could see from the photos of Colorado that in fact it looks nothing like Belize- and I can only imagine that the only thing in common is that US Capital Energy has investments in both places and the Government is happy about it in both places. I wonder what the communities think.

So there were some good questions asked, some important comments made, I managed to get a question in – but it is at times like this that I wish I was so much more eloquent, knew what I was talking about a bit more, and was not obviously a foreigner. It is a really interesting dynamic, because there are quite a few ex-pats in Punta Gorda, lots of them working for NGOs and in business, lots of American volunteers in various organizations. It makes me wonder what Belizeans really think about foreigners delving into their issues. In a country that this year will be only celebrating their 25 years of independence- they are probably used to white influence- and this is just a different type of colonialism. I am struggling with this. Can I only ever feel legitimate as a voice, as a concerned citizen, when I am working in Canada? But even then, would I feel just as foreign in the Canadian north, in the west, in the east? For someone who advocates for community involvement and grassroots action, I feel like I’m not sure where my roots are or should be?

I hope I can have a legitimate voice, be concerned and active citizen wherever I find myself- Canada or abroad- because the reality is that I just couldn’t sit in that meeting yesterday and NOT say something. Especially when I have done a little research and know enough to know most of what was said was bullshit. And I know that searching for oil and finding it will change this incredible place forever. Change it in a way that I really don’t think will benefit many people in Belize. The risks are too damn high. I guess we will have to figure out how we can best negotiate, discuss and ensure that if this all goes ahead we know what to ask for(not sure how long a small indigenous organization can stop an American oil company…) . I guess that is the next step.

In other news, I was sad last weekend to say goodbye to my friend Emily who has been down here since we arrived and we have become great friends – and I miss her! I hope she is rocking it, feeling fantastic and speaking a li creole in Portland gyal! PG misses you! Jimayla pulled at my shorts this morning, looking up with her beautiful dark eyes behind some braids asking "you rememeber me?" I said of course and asked if she missed miss emily. she misses you too! claro!

Here are some shots of em, Pastor and i having a li blast in PG (check out our sweet twisty braids!)

Here we are hiking through the Sarstoon Temash park, Josh is identifying some critter's footprints with his son Issac and Tomas the park ranger.

Well it has been awhile since i have written. Not that there is a shortage of things to share and write about!

My mom was visiting for 2.5 weeks which was great! we had a lot of fun, adventured very well. It was very cool to share this place with her, to watch as she bravely jumped into caribbean waters teeming with nurse sharks (they are friendly!) flippers, goggles, snorkel and all. She loved swimming with the tropical fish and sting rays! How could you not really? After hanging on Caye Caulker for a few days

we went to Tikal in Guatemala to spend some time in the incredible Mayan ruins there. Climbed temples with my mom above the jungle canopy, above the howler monkeys, to look out onto the tops of temples popping up through the jungle and only try to imagine what Tikal was like in its prime. Only trying to imagine why these amazing cities were abandoned, only trying to imagine how they figured out such an elaborate calendar, astrological theories, etc, etc, etc. (did you hear mel gibson is making a movie about the ancient mayas right now?) It was neat to see some changes to Tikal and get a feel for guatemala again since I had been there 5 years ago (amazing how time flies!!) I have to say i realized how relaxed Belizeans and Belize in general is compared to guatemala. Probably for many reasons (no civil war and military state terror being a big one i bet). It already felt like coming home to cross that border into Belize and to finally reach PG. Although there are some really nice restaurants and the architecture in Guatemala is much more beautiful - especially in towns like Flores- then the wooden clapboard houses on stilts of belize. but the charm in belize is huge. i am loving it.

The rainy season is now in full swing- and as my mom can tell you- it rains a lot. hard. i tell you! and the thunder.loud. crazy lightening storms pretty much every night. yet, the temp does not really fall. belizeans think they need sweaters- but i have only used my sweater in ac conditions. it is still hot. the heat is on. but, i hear it is in canada too...

jim and i took mom to the beach at Placencia, which she loved and opted to stay an extra night at our seaside cabana. Besides that, we hung out in PG, played poker with our friends, biked around, visited some other ruins in the region. it was a really nice holiday for me too!

Now it is back to 'work' for me. I continue to really enjoy it. the latest on the supreme court case is that the Judge was supposed to make a final decision in July, but he postponed it until Sept 29 now. so we wait and try to keep the pressure on. the injunction continues so the oil company cannot go into the National Park. We are somewhat worried that if the Judge rules that it is illegal to explore for oil in a National Park, that the gov't may simply de-reserve the Park- so that they can explore for oil. that would really mess up SATIIM, since its whole purpose is to co-manage the park. So we continue to lobby other protected area managers (of which there are over 90 for a country with only 250,000 people!), the public, anyone we can. and slowly the support is starting to come. other NGOs are making public statements about how they too are concerned and we have also got some excellent international support through one of our partners in the states EcoLogic and now Global Response- they will be taking on our campaign, so hopefully you will all be getting emails from their networks soon about how you can take action to help protect southern Belize's protected areas from US oil developers!!!

Jim's research continues to be going well. He is also really interested in this oil issue- it fits quite nicely into what he is looking at. This morning he left at 4am for a conference in Cayo District (north west from here) on indigenous peoples, conservation and development. should be interesting.

Tonight i am going to a good bye party for an american peace corps who has been here for two years and goes home tomorrow! It should be fun- bbq and beer belizean style.

Hope everyone is enjoying their summers and taking in some good camping trips and music festivals : )

take care & peace y'all.